I can't trust him anymore.

Discuss the problems that can occur in relationships with differing cultures and help overcome any barriers that exist.

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Scottishtourist
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I can't trust him anymore.

Post by Scottishtourist »

How many times have I heard this?

Whenever I come to Luxor/Egypt,I always seem to get chatting with other guests in the hotel.In a lot of cases,they are single females.They all have a "love"story to tell!They've visited before,have met an Egyptian man,fallen in love and have come back to see them.

I sometimes exchange numbers and keep in touch.At the moment,I'm keeping in touch with two women I've met.

One is a divorcee,aged 51.She met a man from Luxor (25years old)via facebook.She visited,married him and hoped to live "happily ever after"In less than two years,her bank account has been depleted to the tune of £30000 due to her paying for visits,hotels,apartments,etc.
The other is a beautiful young woman,29years old who was supposed to marry her "fiance"in September.I met her in Hurghada.What a bloomin fiasco!

Both relationships have now "soured."The've changed their numbers,deleted their skype,viber,etc.
They've decided they want no more contact..even though they're both heartbroken!They've either had proof,evidence or suspicions that their "men"weren't as honest as they claimed to be!

So..how would you deal with the situation?Would you want some kind of "closure"and ask questions as to why they've treated you the way they did?Especially when it's apparant that deep emotions are involved?
Would you try to stay in contact,secretly harbouring a desire that everything would work out ok?
Or would you cut all contact..and be content in never knowing the true reasons for their behaviour?

It's hypothetical question (on my part.),any views or opinions?



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Re: I can't trust him anymore.

Post by newcastle »

Scottishtourist wrote:How many times have I heard this?

Whenever I come to Luxor/Egypt,I always seem to get chatting with other guests in the hotel.In a lot of cases,they are single females.They all have a "love"story to tell!They've visited before,have met an Egyptian man,fallen in love and have come back to see them.

I sometimes exchange numbers and keep in touch.At the moment,I'm keeping in touch with two women I've met.

One is a divorcee,aged 51.She met a man from Luxor (25years old)via facebook.She visited,married him and hoped to live "happily ever after"In less than two years,her bank account has been depleted to the tune of £30000 due to her paying for visits,hotels,apartments,etc.
The other is a beautiful young woman,29years old who was supposed to marry her "fiance"in September.I met her in Hurghada.What a bloomin fiasco!

Both relationships have now "soured."The've changed their numbers,deleted their skype,viber,etc.
They've decided they want no more contact..even though they're both heartbroken!They've either had proof,evidence or suspicions that their "men"weren't as honest as they claimed to be!

So..how would you deal with the situation?Would you want some kind of "closure"and ask questions as to why they've treated you the way they did?Especially when it's apparant that deep emotions are involved?
Would you try to stay in contact,secretly harbouring a desire that everything would work out ok?
Or would you cut all contact..and be content in never knowing the true reasons for their behaviour?

It's hypothetical question (on my part.),any views or opinions?

"How many times have I heard this".....?? More than enough, thank you :stp .

TAXI !!! :bye:

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Re: I can't trust him anymore.

Post by LovelyLadyLux »

I think you might find on here if you do a search that there were many first hand experiences that were thoroughly vetted, explored, talked about, suggestions given etc.

I'd only say that if a relationship (anywhere) is over why would you want to talk about the reasons why? If you don't or can't trust him why would you want to talk to him to solicit his reasons for not wanting to maintain a relationship with you? Could you trust his reasons to be valid anyway?

The depleting of bank accounts seems to be the one constant coming out of Egypt. If this revenue source dries up then the economic index will go down another few notches.

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Re: I can't trust him anymore.

Post by carrie »

Tell them to forget it ST an expensive but hopefully well learned lesson. In my opinion the women who come to live here because they love Egypt and the lifestyle cope very well, it's those that only come because they have met the love of their lives that seem to suffer so much. Maybe I'm a cynic or hard hearted but on the whole I blame the women for the situations they find themselves in. They certainly seem to leave their brains at the airport, thye are usually lacking in self confidence, little self respect and after all the men don't hold a gun at your head to get the money.
Sorry heard too many stories and often like your friends seem to be doing, they hold on to the relationship even though they know it is not genuine

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Re: I can't trust him anymore.

Post by BENNU »

Scottishtourist wrote:
So..how would you deal with the situation?Would you want some kind of "closure"and ask questions as to why they've treated you the way they did?
I would ask myself why I allowed them to treat me the way they did!

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Re: I can't trust him anymore.

Post by Scottishtourist »

BENNU wrote:
Scottishtourist wrote:
So..how would you deal with the situation?Would you want some kind of "closure"and ask questions as to why they've treated you the way they did?
I would ask myself why I allowed them to treat me the way they did!
That was exactly my opinion Bennu.
Cos,we are all treated the way we "allow"ourselves to be treated!
I feel so sorry for them.They thought they were in love..but it wasn't entirely reciprocated!Now they're hurting badly.I consider them "brave"but fact remains that they've been used,abused in an emotional manner..and it ain't nice for them.

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Re: I can't trust him anymore.

Post by carrie »

What's "brave" about them, stupid maybe, lacking in self esteem but never brave.

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Re: I can't trust him anymore.

Post by Zooropa »

Its not hard to see why many (all of my friends and work colleagues for a start) think I and others are mad to come here all the time.

Hassle, revolutions, hassle, carriage owners, hawkers, gold digging men, hassle, hassle.

Did I mention the hassle?

Im sure if it were anywhere else we wouldn't even dream of coming/living there.

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Re: I can't trust him anymore.

Post by newcastle »

Zooropa wrote:Its not hard to see why many (all of my friends and work colleagues for a start) think I and others are mad to come here all the time.

Hassle, revolutions, hassle, carriage owners, hawkers, gold digging men, hassle, hassle.

Did I mention the hassle?

Im sure if it were anywhere else we wouldn't even dream of coming/living there.

All very true....but at least it's rarely boring :lol:

And where else in the world could you go for two weeks and return with enough things to whinge about for the next fifty ? :cg

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Re: I can't trust him anymore.

Post by carrie »

Plus a husband.

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Re: I can't trust him anymore.

Post by LovelyLadyLux »

Can you love somebody if you can't or do not trust them? Are love and trust synonymous?

So many of the threads pertaining to ladies and Egyptian guys reference love and trust. Can they really love their (ahem) young men if they don't trust them? And what comes first - Love or trust? And if you only have 1 of these do you really have the other? Or can they be mutually exclusive?

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Re: I can't trust him anymore.

Post by Chocolate Eclair »

So they met 25 years ago via Facebook, uuummmmhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!! I make that 1989, is that correct?

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Re: I can't trust him anymore.

Post by BENNU »

Chocolate Eclair wrote:So they met 25 years ago via Facebook, uuummmmhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!! I make that 1989, is that correct?
No

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Re: I can't trust him anymore.

Post by BENNU »

Scottishtourist wrote: Now they're hurting badly.I consider them "brave"but fact remains that they've been used,abused in an emotional manner..and it ain't nice for them.
carrie wrote:What's "brave" about them, stupid maybe, lacking in self esteem but never brave.
If someone goes through hard times while recovering, they have to be brave not to fall back.

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Re: I can't trust him anymore.

Post by BENNU »

LovelyLadyLux wrote:Can you love somebody if you can't or do not trust them? Are love and trust synonymous?

So many of the threads pertaining to ladies and Egyptian guys reference love and trust. Can they really love their (ahem) young men if they don't trust them? And what comes first - Love or trust? And if you only have 1 of these do you really have the other? Or can they be mutually exclusive?
These women trusted the wrong men, believing that it was love. When the trust was gone, they knew that they had been wrong.

If a beloved relative for example becomes addicted to drugs or alcohol, so that you know that they cannot be trusted, you can still love them. I would not base a relation, a partnership on that kind of feeling, of course.

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Re: I can't trust him anymore.

Post by Dusak »

These loveless support victims are useless, ignorant half wits that allow their labia to rule their thoughts. They are easily manipulated human beings that live for the moment blindly going where other, more intelligent humans would not tread. They deserve no sympathy. They continually refuse to see what is before their eyes, refuse advice from those that have trodden the same pathways. They deserve to loose whatever they have lost and do not have any rights to utter one word to others concerning the matter and I for one grow tiered of the relentless discussions concerning their level of stupidity.
Life is your's to do with as you wish- do not let other's try to control it for you. Count Dusak- 1345.

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Re: I can't trust him anymore.

Post by carrie »

Lots of "likes" for that one Dusak.

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Re: I can't trust him anymore.

Post by Bullet Magnet »

I was quite surprised when I picked up a copy of a well known Woman's magazine the other day that had slipped down behind the bedside table..
To think I was right all those years ago, almost beggars belief.. Almost... :cg
There's a time for everyone, if they only learn
That the twisting kaleidoscope moves us all in turn.

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Re: I can't trust him anymore.

Post by dsaxelby »

It would be interesting for a Freudian to explain the psychology, perhaps the involvement of a son complex enhances the emotion, we forgive our children their mistakes. :o
It is what it is.

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Re: I can't trust him anymore.

Post by Bullet Magnet »

What is so sad, is that this story has been told so many times, and yet lessons do not get learned, even today..
There's a time for everyone, if they only learn
That the twisting kaleidoscope moves us all in turn.

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