I can't trust him anymore.

Discuss the problems that can occur in relationships with differing cultures and help overcome any barriers that exist.

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Re: I can't trust him anymore.

Post by dsaxelby »

Bullet Magnet wrote:What is so sad, is that this story has been told so many times, and yet lessons do not get learned, even today..
For what ever reason it goes on, in Egypt the UK, people taking advantage of each other, the old adage ' learn from your own mistakes' if it never has happened to you, or you would never do this, it is hard to believe others would.


It is what it is.

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Re: I can't trust him anymore.

Post by dsaxelby »

I really do not think just calling the women names helps anybody, emotions are real, people come to this site for help and there will always be people needing help. One thing the woman do not realise is that not only do men think differently to us but Egyptian men really do not see the consequences of their actions or they should be forgiven as they are in there daily lives. They can beat, rape abuse there wives with impunity.

I share a communication with my ex, who honestly believes I will go back to him. If he gets me back no court case. I was attempting to settle and finish this matter a year on. But no luck.


26 June 21:11



Miss u







Im sorry for everything






Wednesday 22:36



what do you want Abdel ?






Thursday 20:46



Im jest feel sorry for what I did to u . U no deserve this from me . U r the only one help me and look after me im sorry honey x







Perhaps I would believe you if you had divorced me and let me go easy, but still you want to make problems for me. Sorry I do not believe you.







I still love u







If you love something let it go, if it comes back it was yours, if it does not it never was.







u know and I know you are mine and we r for each other allwys . Please give me another chance x







We had our time, what we did with it well.... perhaps we were brought together to be friends, business partners and we got it wrong. Hey Ho this is the life, no Abdel never, you do not do what you did to someone and think they would ever take you back.lol....
Please I hate stupid ....
So stop this rubbish, you know I am not coming back so what do you want shall we try honesty now, would be nice?
How is Monique and Mansour lol...







Wahy u not come back maybe im change now try
Ha ha ha I don't know if they still together







The restaurant was for you to change to have self respect to make an honest living, really I tried everything but you are what you are and will never change.
I see you have been eating the profits at the restaurant lol....







Try me this time please







this is boring Abdel ....
you really do not know me at all.







Im only the one know u very will and I know your hart very will







it is your time to make a choice, let me go maybe we can eventually be friends, maybe I bring the ex-pats to the restaurant, or I never speak to you again. simples
No you met a very sad lost person who was trying to find a point to life
I feel better now more like my old self, the one that can take on the world and win
You belong to Carole so be a decent human being
and stop eating all my profits !







Now you r the one I love the one make me laugh







Abdel I talk to Carole... I go now the answer will come from the lawyer, goodbye







ok waht you want me to do now







Divorce me







Ok . How can I do this







tell your lawyer you sign the papers







I tell my lawyer you sign no need to wait for the Judge







And waht u gone do for me in the qaort







Divorce you all I ever wanted is to be free
I rather you stood up and did the right thing
always I help you be a better man







ok I will divorce u







ring him now so I can ring mine then I can go to sleep







ok I will .and what you gonna do with me in the qaort







court ? what court







My lawyer told me thay want me in the court in sebtmber cos of the money u give me







Do you have the money?







U know I don't







Give me Mahmouds car a jaccuzzi I know you have 2
You will only kill yourself in the car







Yes u waht im like







and 20% discount on all the food at the restaurant for life
if there is any food left after you have eaten it lol....







lol....







I miss ur joq







who says I am joking ..... lol...







Wher r u







sitting in my bed waiting to sleep?







I bet your at the restaurant lol....







In karnk







never I tell you lol.....







perhaps or maybe Italy
Ireland was interesting
or in prison for murdering my Nan!!!!!!
lol......







REALLY WHER ARE YOU







why?







Just want to know







it is not important where I am Abdel now back to our Divorce#







Ok miss funy







Are we agreed







Waht about







you cannot cook how you survive prison, eggs get boring
we had this conversation before remember
do you have a son yet?




No







another daughter?







No







well keep trying







Ok I am tired now we Divorce each other you give the car and a Jacuzzi and 20% discount







I please don't play with me can u be sires







sires?







not playing Abdel?







I don't have mahmoud car . I have changed it to small one so I can give you free meal in the restaurant







ok we leave it to the lawyers







goodnight Abdel







Why we can not fix it now







£30,000.00 and I get a meal really you to rude lol...







Wahy u try to make me stay with nothing .







how nothing? really you actor now, you have your home contents business your health. I bought a car I want a car, I want a Jacuzzi you have 2, honestly you think I could not buy these things with £30,000.00







I wasn't this bad to u .Did I never do anything good to u only u remember the bad







still I am fair to you and unfair to myself
Abdel you tried to have sex with my daughters you planned my death and killed my unborn baby.
it is a little hard to get past this


then you threatened to kill me tried to take my apartment and then told people I killed my Grandmother
should I go on



oh then you said the money bought the apartment when the money e apartment went through in the UK







Im never tried to kill u where you get this from







you told me if I came back to Luxor you will kill me
you told xxxxxxxx if I was dead would she have sex with you

well that was a nasty trip down memory lane
what happy memory was you referring to?







Ok how many times u come back to luxor wahy I don't tried to kill u . Do you really think im gona do this to u







I'm still waiting for the happy memory







I told u im sorry for everything please im not will







No I know we believe in Karma
you will not be well until you make it right
goodnight Abdel







Ok please help me to make it right please help me this time







Only you can make right what you did wrong you







So I want fixed singth with you waht can I do







R u sleep






Friday 1:04



Good night x




Friday 20:08



How are you today x
It is what it is.

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Re: I can't trust him anymore.

Post by LovelyLadyLux »

@ Dsaxelby - Wow - just read your exchange and honestly do not know how you had/have the stamina to deal with that. I couldn't remotely go there and even engage let alone maintain a conversation.......Ridiculous narcissistic cyclical - cut your losses and run fast, run far, run free!!! (I recently said that somewhere else on here and I think it applies to you too! ;) ;) )

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Re: I can't trust him anymore.

Post by dsaxelby »

LovelyLadyLux wrote:@ Dsaxelby - Wow - just read your exchange and honestly do not know how you had/have the stamina to deal with that. I couldn't remotely go there and even engage let alone maintain a conversation.......Ridiculous narcissistic cyclical - cut your losses and run fast, run far, run free!!! (I recently said that somewhere else on here and I think it applies to you too! ;) ;) )
I would even apologise if it got me the outcome I want. I did not come to Luxor for him, it was not the sex either D, he was a byproduct. But life does get better, you have to change it though.
It is what it is.

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Re: I can't trust him anymore.

Post by Who2 »

Couldn't be bothered reading the texts, but I know of people who will 'top-him for 500le considering the current economic climate. cheap in my estimation..:cool:
"The Salvation of Mankind lies in making everything the responsibility of All"
Sophocles.

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Re: I can't trust him anymore.

Post by Bullet Magnet »

So. the mental torture still goes on.. Change your Mobile number dsaxelby, or have his number barred...
There is probably a special hell waiting for men who mess with women, infact, I know there is.. :cool:
There's a time for everyone, if they only learn
That the twisting kaleidoscope moves us all in turn.

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Re: I can't trust him anymore.

Post by Dusak »

dsaxelby wrote:
LovelyLadyLux wrote:@ Dsaxelby - Wow - just read your exchange and honestly do not know how you had/have the stamina to deal with that. I couldn't remotely go there and even engage let alone maintain a conversation.......Ridiculous narcissistic cyclical - cut your losses and run fast, run far, run free!!! (I recently said that somewhere else on here and I think it applies to you too! ;) ;) )
I would even apologise if it got me the outcome I want. I did not come to Luxor for him, it was not the sex either D, he was a byproduct. But life does get better, you have to change it though.
I thought you just came over to deliver cheese. :o
Life is your's to do with as you wish- do not let other's try to control it for you. Count Dusak- 1345.

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Re: I can't trust him anymore.

Post by dsaxelby »

Dusak wrote:
dsaxelby wrote:
LovelyLadyLux wrote:@ Dsaxelby - Wow - just read your exchange and honestly do not know how you had/have the stamina to deal with that. I couldn't remotely go there and even engage let alone maintain a conversation.......Ridiculous narcissistic cyclical - cut your losses and run fast, run far, run free!!! (I recently said that somewhere else on here and I think it applies to you too! ;) ;) )
I would even apologise if it got me the outcome I want. I did not come to Luxor for him, it was not the sex either D, he was a byproduct. But life does get better, you have to change it though.
I thought you just came over to deliver cheese. :o
:lol: :lol: you always make me smile D,

He turned up on facebook unfortunately there is only 1 of me on there but blocked him :up :up
It is what it is.

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Re: I can't trust him anymore.

Post by dsaxelby »

Bullet Magnet wrote:So. the mental torture still goes on.. Change your Mobile number dsaxelby, or have his number barred...
There is probably a special hell waiting for men who mess with women, infact, I know there is.. :cool:

I'm ok BM would not have shared if there had not been acceptance and some closure, he is not unique just that this is a common way the Egyptian male will view you (European) women. They are worse to their Egyptian wives. (ok not all).

I feel for Carole who has recently lost her father, pretty sure he has been working on her for a while now, then to see him as a follower post all over my facebook, he did come unstuck, she is my friend, she started liking certain posts. I hope another hit of his vileness gives her the courage to step away. Blocked him now, had a message from Patricia Pool :lol: :lol: English lady NOT!
It is what it is.

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Re: I can't trust him anymore.

Post by LovelyLadyLux »

@ Dsaxelby - EXTRICATE you from this Anguishing mental cr*p and all the people who are wallowing in their own soul sucking emotional turmoil..........Run far, run fast and run FREE!!!

Honestly - nothing - not a Jacuzzi or anything is worth listening to any of this drivel as while you may have some closure there are still elements of this scenario that will niggle in and bug you. You're only going through life once. This isn't a stage rehearsal for the final show - life nicely, calmly, pleasantly in peace and harmony within your world.

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Re: I can't trust him anymore.

Post by dsaxelby »

LovelyLadyLux wrote:@ Dsaxelby - EXTRICATE you from this Anguishing mental cr*p and all the people who are wallowing in their own soul sucking emotional turmoil..........Run far, run fast and run FREE!!!

Honestly - nothing - not a Jacuzzi or anything is worth listening to any of this drivel as while you may have some closure there are still elements of this scenario that will niggle in and bug you. You're only going through life once. This isn't a stage rehearsal for the final show - life nicely, calmly, pleasantly in peace and harmony within your world.

Never thought to get the money back, just a divorce, but it is all tied together now. Honestly LLL I was so lucky, it could all have been so much worse for me and my girls on so many levels.

It does annoy me the time it is taking to extract myself from this fake marriage!!!!! but even that will happen, so I am not stressing it. He is in fact out of lives and has been for a year, it is the court date that has woken him up.

Just when someone comes on with the same old tale, please have some compassion it maybe the first time they are experiencing it.
It is what it is.

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Re: I can't trust him anymore.

Post by Dusak »

dsaxelby wrote:
LovelyLadyLux wrote:@ Dsaxelby - EXTRICATE you from this Anguishing mental cr*p and all the people who are wallowing in their own soul sucking emotional turmoil..........Run far, run fast and run FREE!!!

Honestly - nothing - not a Jacuzzi or anything is worth listening to any of this drivel as while you may have some closure there are still elements of this scenario that will niggle in and bug you. You're only going through life once. This isn't a stage rehearsal for the final show - life nicely, calmly, pleasantly in peace and harmony within your world.

Never thought to get the money back, just a divorce, but it is all tied together now. Honestly LLL I was so lucky, it could all have been so much worse for me and my girls on so many levels.

It does annoy me the time it is taking to extract myself from this fake marriage!!!!! but even that will happen, so I am not stressing it. He is in fact out of lives and has been for a year, it is the court date that has woken him up.

Just when someone comes on with the same old tale, please have some compassion it maybe the first time they are experiencing it.
You and I now know each other quite well dsaxelby, and stupid you are not. You have learned from your mistakes, be it the hard way and I'm quite certain that you would of been familiar to all the broken heart stories that have relentlessly appeared on this forum over the years.

But you chose to throw caution to the wind, whether it be because you genuinely thought yours was entirely different from the rest, or you could control him and any problems that may surface in the future, especially with your professional background. But, and I say this as a friend, you did choose to ignore the advice from L, and my friend K as to the real side to this man. Living here, we get to know all the familiar faces, their history and techniques they use to ensnare ladies like yourself. You entered the trophy room, a room that is hard to leave without considerable loss to yourself, emotionally or otherwise.

There are successful mixed marriages here involving good honest Egyptian men, I know of several that have stood the test of time over a number of years, and good on them, they are the lucky ones that have found love and companionship here in Egypt. But this one [your ex] was on the ''to be avoided list'' way before you entered the country. Taxi drivers like him are predators, they not only get the taxi to earn a living, but they realize such a vehicle could lead then onto a much easy life if they get the 'perfect fare' especially if that fare is a first time visitor, a little wary of the strange surroundings and they suddenly find themselves in the company of an English speaking taxi driver that immediately warns them of the bad ones that could pester her. ''Use me for anything you need, you can trust me.'' The honest sounding charm just rolls off their cunning tongues. And so the story begins.

Your last line led to this reply. Compassion, in regards to these fallen foul females, is not justified to me. They so easily give over all they have saved, inherited or worked for in a blink of an eye. Something that they would not normally contemplate doing in their own country towards a relative stranger. OK, so they may not know of the existence of this forum, but surly they have friends that have advised on the side of caution some time or other when this new found relationship became public knowledge, they can not be so blind as to not have been aware of such things with the likes of FB, magazines and such like being so readily to hand. You do learn from your mistakes in life and try to make certain that it never happens again, but if that mistake involves the loss of everything of worth that you have, then there is no learning to be had as its all gone for good. And it could only be the first time they have experienced it, but there will not be a second time cos there aint anything left for a second go.
Life is your's to do with as you wish- do not let other's try to control it for you. Count Dusak- 1345.

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Re: I can't trust him anymore.

Post by LovelyLadyLux »

I'm aware in good old Luxor of an organized group of Egyptian men who work in and out of the hotels providing a service during the high times of readily arriving tourists. The English speaking ones had work that allowed them to survey the newly arrived lady tourists whilst catering to them and spot out the unaccompanied lonely looking ladies. They'd note them well and do the tasks at hand but when they returned to meet up with them for payment they'd bring the non-English speaking Egyptian friend. Introductions were made via the translator with all the phony baloney verbal crap they spew and ensure the 'connection' was made. They'd text/email for the non-English speaking Egyptian so as to keep the relationship going. These guys were schooled organized cons who knew exactly how 'hook line and sinker' to get to the emotions of a woman.

The deal WAS if the little old naïve lady mark bites, marries (orfi or not) and takes this guy back to the UK (which was the goal) this man then owes X amount of $$ for the initial invite and had to pay this organized equivalent of an Egyptian mafia. If he didn't pay - well there always IS family in Luxor.

This was extremely predatory, organized, targeting and efficient. Many of the women arrived with no intention whatsoever of even meeting up with somebody BUT when taken out of their regular life setting, flattered (to put it lightly) and mentally and emotionally set up - they took the bait. They were shown impoverished grubby living conditions, intolerably lifestyles - anything and everything was done to work on their emotions so they'd start connecting with the Egyptian. AND the Egyptian male was taught how to solicit money AND was pressured to do whatever so as get money as he needed to pay back those who introduced him. Human trafficking IMO and definitely not always the woman's fault. And I'm not talking about some of the regular independent con men/gigalos i.e. the caliche drivers, felluca guys. The ones I'm talking about were not out for the gigalo trade. They had much bigger fish to fry so to speak.........

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Re: I can't trust him anymore.

Post by dsaxelby »

My leaving line to our friend is 'not married, not pregnant and not given over a key' we joke but there is irony in the line. Should start adding 'purse closed' ;)


Fair point D, :(
It is what it is.

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Re: I can't trust him anymore.

Post by carrie »

here goes Hard Hearted Hannah, you were oviously vulnerable when you met this man, as so many women who come here are, these men can spot them a mile off.
From your posts he has receieved a large sum of money from you, tried to seduce your children, accussed you of murder, threatened to kill you, been responsible for the death of your un born child, you were warned against this man, why oh why did you let it get so far. And then you carry on a long conversation with him, discussing how much discount you will receive in the restaurant, how are presumably mutual friends, has he had another child yet. Why?
You could have responded by saying please dont contact me again see you in court. Then blocked him end of tht story. But like so many others you appear to want drag out the contact. Give it up, he's no good, never will be, this is what I blame the women for not the original mistakes anyone can do that but the wollowing in the aftermath.
Sorry if Ihave angered you but I have seen it so many many times.

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Re: I can't trust him anymore.

Post by dsaxelby »

carrie wrote:here goes Hard Hearted Hannah, you were oviously vulnerable when you met this man, as so many women who come here are, these men can spot them a mile off.
From your posts he has receieved a large sum of money from you, tried to seduce your children, accussed you of murder, threatened to kill you, been responsible for the death of your un born child, you were warned against this man, why oh why did you let it get so far. And then you carry on a long conversation with him, discussing how much discount you will receive in the restaurant, how are presumably mutual friends, has he had another child yet. Why?
You could have responded by saying please dont contact me again see you in court. Then blocked him end of tht story. But like so many others you appear to want drag out the contact. Give it up, he's no good, never will be, this is what I blame the women for not the original mistakes anyone can do that but the wollowing in the aftermath.
Sorry if Ihave angered you but I have seen it so many many times.
Not angry Carrie, it has dragged on from court date to court date this about the 4th now, if we can settle it ends. My comments were actually digs, childish I know, but I am human. I do now hold a record of him not denying, the amount of money, and certain circumstances.

The point is they are oblivious to what has happened, probably never even think about it.
It is what it is.

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Re: I can't trust him anymore.

Post by carrie »

Exactly. That is just what I mean so why keep feeding it and upsetting your self into the bargain. And please please don't tell me that it doesn't upset you, you have been badly hurt, don't mean about the money and other things but emotionally. Ignore him give him a wide berth and move on.

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Re: I can't trust him anymore.

Post by Ruby Slippers »

I've seen loads of examples of this in Egypt, but I wish someone could enlighten me on how a woman can take a man 20 - 30 years her junior seriously! :ni: Don't the women look in the mirror? Or do they have such a high opinion of themselves that his over-the-top compliments are instantly believable? I'm not trying to be offensive here in any way or to anyone, by the way, or talking about anyone personally. I just really, really want an insight into the psyche of these women! :urm:

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Re: I can't trust him anymore.

Post by dsaxelby »

Hey I'll have you know I am still a hot cookie, here in the UK and in Egypt :lol: :lol: :lol:

Each story is unique (well to the individual it is) I am sure and just for the record he was short tubby, bald with glasses and older but he had a charisma and made me laugh, charming, and attentive. I did not jump straight into bed I came home, talked everyday for 3 months and went back again. Perhaps if I had done there would not have been any future correspondence.

Hey Ho..... I'm not here wallowing poor me, it was an example of how they detach their emotions, compassion for another. compartmentalise their emotions, they are thinking me me me me, but perhaps someone else can try to explain their choices????
It is what it is.

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Re: I can't trust him anymore.

Post by Ruby Slippers »

Thanks for replying, DL. I really am not trying to 'get' at anyone or personalise my post. It's just that I saw it happen with a friend of mine - she was in her 50's and a good looking woman, smart, intelligent, great sense of humour etc. - and he was in his early 30's. She was also divorced, with her own property and had two sons almost the same age as him. To this day I still don't understand how she could be taken in! :ni: Fortunately (or unfortunately, depending on your viewpoint) he didn't manage to get that much out of her, but I met him about 5 years later and he admitted that it 'wasn't forever'!

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