Getting old does kind of suck.
I farm out work that normally I would have thrown myself into without hesitation.
Earlier this year, with the prospect of having to work another 4 years looming ahead of me, synchronicity kicked in and the universe was speaking to me in only the way the universe can and I handed in my notice at work and decided never to work again and retire.
I had no idea how I was going to support myself, but within a month I had enough money to see me through until I can get my hard earned state pension.
Since retiring, I have managed to reignite my passion for fixing and modifying cars, using my wife's trusty Ford Focus as a test subject.
I am rather proud of the results of my efforts over the last 3 or 4 months.
I can now do whatever I want, I have done many jobs around the house and garden.
The only job left to do, is the clean the higher level front gutters.
I now realise that I am not as happy as I was 20 feet up in the air on a set of ladders, and so I have put that job off and will need to farm it out.
It's great being able to live my life for myself and my family.
I'm working hard at making my kids less depended on me, as I realise I have a lot less years in front of me than I did.
My dear old mum died at 43 years old, but I know it was the right time to die for her, because everyone she cared about was at a good place in their life, and they could manage without her.
Though she never really left me completely, I hope she would be proud of the son she raised.
Yes, I have made foolish mistakes along the way, But, I am only human after all, and what's more important than regretting them is that I have learned from them.
I have always been a PC fan, and have always built my own computers. My current rig is about 3 years old but has had a few upgrades recently. I use the best components I can buy, including the monitor, which is 27" so easy on my old eyes.
I haven't used it much since retiring, as I was staring into a screen for the last 30 years. The sudden wrench away from employment meant that I didn't really want to be around my computer at home.
Plus I was outside for most of this great summer we have enjoyed here in the UK.
Now the darker nights are drawing in, I may start to use it again. Or I may sell it and top up my savings.
I have a few easy jobs lined up, some painting and decorating inside the house. Since of the rooms haven't been used in years, so need a refresh.
We have had loads of days out and mini breaks, I have been able to focus my attention on helping my wife recover, and she is making improvements in recent months. Hopefully by the end of this year she will be in a much better place.
We just got back from the isle of man after spending another week there this year, the island of dreams as I call it.. Its esoteric...
Anyhow, we are now looking at getting g back to Luxor again as soon as the flights are available and spend at least 2 weeks there.
The great thing is, that we no longer have to rush back to work or run our lives around work, so we can spend longer away than we used to, so that 2 weeks may be a bit longer than that.
Now I am older and I hope much wiser, I can reflect on the last 63 years and enjoy many happy memories.
But the present is where its at, and always has been. Who knows what the future will hold and how much there is left of it?
So, live for the day and hope that there is another sunrise waiting to greet me in the morning. If not, then all I will say is that this crazy dream was a worthwhile experience.
Bo one gets out of this game alive. But some of us are trying.
Don't look back. That's not the direction you are travelling towards.
